A DD/lg dynamic blog, with overtones of BDSM and whatever else I feel like posting. :P
(This is a sexually explicit blog. If you are under 18, Please leave now. I *will* block people.)
I had a pretty bad week. Stuff happened at work, a guy I’d been talking to heard “poly” as “hoebag” and gave me a lecture about how I’m endangering myself and everyone I sleep with, and I’ve been just plain lonely.
Just now, I logged into Fetlife for the first time since the breakup, and the only thing on my feed was my ex-Daddy flirting with another girl and telling her what he wanted to do to her. The only thing. There are, like, four posts.
I cried a little. It hurt a lot. It made me feel sick and sad and even more lonely. I miss him. Just because I know I did the right thing, doesn’t mean I don’t miss him sometimes.
I need a hug and snuggles so badly.
I had to be at work today at 5:30 am for Black Friday. My roommate and I decided (possibly stupidly, I haven’t decided) that it would probably be easier to just stay up all night, since it meant we’d have to get up about three am. So, we drove into the city and went to a show, danced our butts off, and then killed time in a few places that were open that early before hitting Starbucks for coffee and breakfast (and to change clothes in their bathroom like hobos, because we decided it was too dangerous to go home and risk falling asleep.) Then we worked from 5:30 am to 3 pm.
By the time we were done, I was so tired that I’d ceased being able to consistently string together sentences that made sense. I was up for over 28 hours. I came home and ate, and immediately passed out. I woke up again about ten pm.
Now I’m eating again and watching Despicable Me because all I wanted when I got home was for someone to be there to feed me and tuck me in and snuggle me until I passed out. It’s not the same, but it helps.
Seriously, fuck Black Friday.
how do you even go about explaining the dw 50th special to someone
THE DOCTOR MET THE DOCTOR AND THE DOCTOR WHO IS ACTUALLY THE WARRIOR AND THE WARRIOR WAS LIKE I HAVE TO BURN GALLIFREY BUT THEN THE DOCTOR WAS LIKE:
lets put it in a painting
This is the best summary I’ve seen of the 50th Special.
It really hurts, tonight.
I know this blog has been really whiny lately, and I’m sorry, but this is the only place I can really vent. And it really, really hurts tonight. Like, I want to act out I’m so lonely and hurt. Take-home-a-stranger lonely.
I’m starting to get sick again.
I’m nauseated, and icky and I want my Daddy. But he’s not coming to save me, this time. :(
How do you know you’re really broken up over something, as a babygirl?
Well, when you experience very little emotion over it past the initial bit, but watching Pocahontas makes you cry, that’s a pretty good indicator.
We talked a little bit over gchat last night, about as much as I could manage. Then I put on Pochahontas and crawled in bed, thinking that would comfort me and help me sleep. ‘Just Around The River Bend’ made me bawl.
Thank you, Lizbeth. You’re a treasure.
I know eventually it’ll be okay, but I feel really broken right now. To be honest, there was already way too much going on before this happened. And I’m working two jobs right now, since I just moved, and spending weekends trying to help my parents get their house ready to sell, so I never really have a moment to try to process anything.
I’m feeling really overwhelmed right now.
This makes me so sad right now.
I miss being Daddy’s favourite girl. :(